Archive for April, 2012

for as long as i can remember, my mom had this picture on the bathroom wall of our old house on keator street. she told me that it was c and i, as angels. i remember looking at that picture every day, thinking that my mom saw my sister and i as angels, and how […]


the first time i saw the flat iron in person, i was walking down the street to the strand, with my good friend, e. upon seeing the building, i did not stand and gape. i did not pull out my camera and begin snapping pictures, like many tourists around us did. i instead pointed and […]


nuns are considered brides of christ. they are considered by the church to be married to god. a nun is a person, but it is also an occupation. other people are married to their jobs; doctors, lawyers. it occurred to me the other day that i am a bride of new york. i love my […]


the glad game

27Apr12

the other day, i was on the phone with f, and hollered to her mom “i miss you!” her mom replied, “i miss your positive attitude.” huh. i guess i do have a positive attitude. even when i bitch about my mom, it is in a somewhat positive way. when i get angry over something […]


change

26Apr12

in summer of 2010, i moved to illinois. the situation at home had become unbearable. i had started to self-harm, and was on a steep sliding roll down. the cutting was not what had finally prompted my dad to arrange my moving in with my aunt; he just wanted her to ‘fix’ me. at least […]


since i was small, i enjoyed escaping my reality via my imagination. like most children, i enjoyed playing ‘house’. i remember being able to open two closet doors so that they resembled double doors, and walking through them in my mom’s shoes, fancying myself as “cinderella”. that was normal, something any kid would do. but […]


the blue shoes

24Apr12

most days, i pick up clothes, sniff them, and shrug. smells clean, i think. most days i brush my hair and my teeth, but sometimes i get lazy. i own four pairs of sweatpants. i actually wear them. but that is okay where i live. i would stick out like a sore thumb wearing anything […]