jesus said, let the little children come to me…

17Apr12


“i like your christ, i do not like your christians. your christians are so unlike your Christ.”
― mahatma ghandi

i have epiphanies. things other people realized long ago, it takes me forever to catch onto. when i do, i usually share them with everyone (“did you know the reason it is called i-90 is because it is interstate 90? why are you laughing at me?”).

image

some things I wore at 16 were not much better than this

a new epiphany leaves me angry. i went to church almost every sunday from 2005 into 2010 wearing clothes that were out of style, faded, tattered, and ill-fitting. at the time, i didn’t realize how so they were, but it had to be blindingly obvious to anyone else. i was very socially awkward, had no apparent friends, seemed depressed, etc. no one stepped in. no one said anything. there were days i would go practically screaming for help, for someone’s shoulder to cry on, but no one looked up. were they too self-absorbed to notice? were they afraid to step in? so many christians don’t seem to have a problem pointing out that homosexuality is wrong, that you should be ashamed for your lust, to tell you to stop using the language you do, but an abused child walks in their midst, and they do nothing?

screw. them.

i will bet you anything that jesus could walk in with his dirty feet, filthy clothes, body odor, beard, etc. instead of welcoming him in, they would probably kick him out – the blood from his ankles and wrists, from where they beat him and shoved the thorns on his head, it might stain the carpet.

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3 Responses to “jesus said, let the little children come to me…”

  1. Hey! Thanks for your comment on my blog.

    I relate to this post, but the reason I wore bad, out-of-style clothes was more because my mom felt like “godliness” had all to do with things like clothes, and language (like you mentioned), and ignoring sexual desires. So interesting. I know all too well these Christians you described in this post. I know all about them. I grew up with them.

    Something I’m REALLY thankful for is that you are recognizing the vast difference between Christians and Christ himself. That’s so great, because so many people don’t stop to think about it, and they live their whole lives believing that God actually IS like those unloving “Christians”. But he’s so incredibly different, as you have set on the journey of finding out. I love it! I’m excited for your journey, and the healing God is going to bring in your heart, and the new friends he will give you who will accurately portray Christ to you, instead of ignoring you. Wow, very cool things are in store for you, and the journey has just begun.

    • thank you for your kind words. i am not going to lie, i have struggled with anger at god for letting all those things happen to me, for putting me in such a helpless situation. however, i am coming to realize that he did it for a reason, that i am so much stronger for it, and that strength is necessary for things to come in my future.

      i think the similarities of our lives is a bit eerie. i look forward to reading more of your blog posts!

  2. I think that’s really normal to be angry at God after experiencing bad things like that. The most meaningful thing anyone ever said to me was a counselor I didn’t even know, as I was crying and venting about all the bad things my mom did to me and my siblings in the name of religion, and she said, “That was wrong.” Just those simple words: That was wrong.

    I don’t believe God “put” you in a helpless situation. He allowed it, which sucks, but he didn’t cause it. I was so angry at God that I fell off the deep end actually, became really promiscuous and did drugs, got pregnant – the whole nine yards.

    How old are you, by the way? I am 26. I’m excited that you’re taking CNA classes. It’s such a hard job! But very worthwhile experience to have.


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