unable to imagine

16May12

recently my dear friend j found the gender of the baby she is carrying.

there is an infant, curling its fists inside her. tiny fists. its tiny body is growing inside her. j’s blood flows through its veins.

unable to imagine.

it is my hope, my prayer, for this child to grow into a strong warrior in this world. i hope that it learns to stand for what it believes in, and stays strong in the face of adversity. i hope it is close with its father, and walks in its mother’s image.

unable to imagine
.

pregnancy is a gift for women. a curse, a blessing. it brings out the ultimate narcissism in parents, the deepest compassion in even the hardest hearts. i cannot imagine putting my hand on my belly, whispering to my little one.

unable to imagine.

someday, i will not have to imagine for i will know. someday, but not today. now it isn’t my time. this time belongs to j, to all the other pregnant women in this world. this is their time. my time will come along maybe five years from now, maybe ten. it is not for me to decide. until then, i am happy, content to be where i am in life. content to be

unable to imagine.

pregnant woman

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3 Responses to “unable to imagine”

  1. beautiful

  2. Beautifully written…when I was carrying my first child I had trouble thinking that it was real and that I would indeed have a baby…which had been my dream…..I am a senior now but still remember that feeling….Diane


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